As I sit on the corner of my bed , all covered up in quilts and whatsapping friends (vitually socializing)..I realize its not something that is making me happy.Talking to friends and not feeling happy,rather feeling an eerie silence in my inner-self (it may be the empty house silence too), something is bad , really really bad.
Conversations like "nice d.p","the smileys" , " ohhh awesome" , "thats amazing","lol" are all void and have not even the tiniest connection to my sentimental half (no offense to people i am whatsapping these days)
Never in my life I had this urge to stay away from any kind of human contact ever...(Stay away I should rather say "run away").Whats going wrong ,once a person who cannot even have a meal of the day alone is now looking for ways to just skip any kind of company he might have..
Deep down on the inside is a feeling that seems caged in a black-box.A feeling I know is there but don't know what it is.There is something that's eating me from inside..its hard to figure out what it is.
There is no lack of trying to overcome this feeling but it's hard when I don't even know what i am fighting against . As goes the lines from the song "Eating Me Alive",
You can sit there and tell me that I didn't try,
And I can honestly tell you that I never lied.
I can't stand this dark feeling, the shark eating me up inside.
Eating me alive.
Eating me alive
I just want to run away from this feeling , fast and so far , that not even the tiniest black shadow of this feeling may fall on my soul..I just want to shout out so loud that my own ears become deaf to the painful howling of this feeling (not an actual deaf) and i want to cry so much that my tears drown the boat full of hideous feelings...
People reading it might feel that what a sadist I am..But trust me you would never like to be in such a position...A position of utter confusion and where you seem nonchalant only from outside but deep inside you know there's a storm rising.. A storm that may subside with only few side-effects or A storm that might wreck the city of your emotions like a tsunami..
But i wont give up and will fight till the very end..As goes the lines from " Until the End"
Conversations like "nice d.p","the smileys" , " ohhh awesome" , "thats amazing","lol" are all void and have not even the tiniest connection to my sentimental half (no offense to people i am whatsapping these days)
Never in my life I had this urge to stay away from any kind of human contact ever...(Stay away I should rather say "run away").Whats going wrong ,once a person who cannot even have a meal of the day alone is now looking for ways to just skip any kind of company he might have..
Deep down on the inside is a feeling that seems caged in a black-box.A feeling I know is there but don't know what it is.There is something that's eating me from inside..its hard to figure out what it is.
There is no lack of trying to overcome this feeling but it's hard when I don't even know what i am fighting against . As goes the lines from the song "Eating Me Alive",
You can sit there and tell me that I didn't try,
And I can honestly tell you that I never lied.
I can't stand this dark feeling, the shark eating me up inside.
Eating me alive.
Eating me alive
I just want to run away from this feeling , fast and so far , that not even the tiniest black shadow of this feeling may fall on my soul..I just want to shout out so loud that my own ears become deaf to the painful howling of this feeling (not an actual deaf) and i want to cry so much that my tears drown the boat full of hideous feelings...
People reading it might feel that what a sadist I am..But trust me you would never like to be in such a position...A position of utter confusion and where you seem nonchalant only from outside but deep inside you know there's a storm rising.. A storm that may subside with only few side-effects or A storm that might wreck the city of your emotions like a tsunami..
But i wont give up and will fight till the very end..As goes the lines from " Until the End"
Alone I'll walk the winding way, here I stay
It's over, no longer I feel it growing stronger
I live to die another day, until I fade away
It's over, no longer I feel it growing stronger
I live to die another day, until I fade away
Why give up? Why give in? It's not enough, it never is
So I will go on until the end
We've become desolate, it's not enough, it never is
But I will go on until the end
So I will go on until the end
We've become desolate, it's not enough, it never is
But I will go on until the end
Surround me, it's easy to fall apart completely
I feel you creeping up again in my head
It's over, no longer I feel it growing colder
I knew this day would come to end, so let this life begin
I feel you creeping up again in my head
It's over, no longer I feel it growing colder
I knew this day would come to end, so let this life begin
Why give up? Why give in? It's not enough, it never is
So I will go on until the end
We've become desolate, it's not enough, it never is
But I will go until the end
So I will go on until the end
We've become desolate, it's not enough, it never is
But I will go until the end
I've lost the way, I've lost the way
But I will go on until the end
Living is hard enough without you fucking up
But I will go on until the end
Living is hard enough without you fucking up
Why give up? Why give in? It's not enough, it never is
So I will go on until the end
We've become desolate, it's not enough, it never is
But I will go on until the end
So I will go on until the end
We've become desolate, it's not enough, it never is
But I will go on until the end
I've lost the way, I've lost the way
But I will go on until the end
But I will go on until the end
The final fight, I win
The final fight, I win
The final fight, I win
But I will go on until the end
The final fight, I win
The final fight, I win
But I will go on until the end
No comments:
Post a Comment